the giver, not the gift. part 1.

My husband and I have been serving the Lord for over a year now. He serves Him when he loves me, I serve Him when I submit to my husband. We serve Him together when we honor each of our parents. And we serve Him when we love our neighbor. We are sell outs. Our desire is less of us... more of Him. And the blessings? Woah, the blessings. Peace and joy and health. Our children. Our families. Our friends. Things that we've always had, but not in the healthy form in which they exist today. Isaiah 61:1-7. The Favor of The Lord The Spirit of God, the Master, is on me because God anointed me. He sent me to preach good news to the poor, heal the heartbroken, Announce freedom to all captives, pardon all prisoners. God sent me to announce the year of his grace— a celebration of God’s destruction of our enemies— and to comfort all who mourn, To care for the needs of all who mourn in Zion, give them bouquets of roses instead of ashes, Messages of joy instead of news of doom, a praising heart instead of a languid spirit. Rename them “Oaks of Righteousness” planted by God to display his glory. They’ll rebuild the old ruins, raise a new city out of the wreckage. They’ll start over on the ruined cities, take the rubble left behind and make it new. Looking at the old ruins in your life, the rubble, the ruined cities. Whether it is friendships, devastation among family members, isolation, shame of poor decisions, guilt, neglect. Rebuild the old ruins. Raise a new city out of the wreckage. Serve God. Heal the brokenhearted. Comfort all who mourn. Messages of joy instead of news of doom.

#blessed

An encouragement to be aware of God's presence in all aspect of our lives.

I have been reading a book called "Seven" by Jen Hatmaker. A mega church pastor's wife who eventually traded in a life of luxury to live a life that more resembles the life of Jesus.

I've, personally, never been one to care much for appearances. I've probably cared less than I should however. More out of laziness than injustice. However, some could argue there have been days as a newborn mother of a newborn and toddler, that what my husband came home to WAS an immeasurable injustice. Poor guy!

So in my recent desire to show the world the same love and grace that the Lord has shown me, I have begun caring more and more about my appearance, out of honor and respect and humility more than out of pride or well... pride. I take time to present myself clean, hair combed, a bit of makeup for some color in these frigid winter months that make me pale as the snow itself, and not only do I put on a bra, but I don't even SAVE the Target special I purchased last week for a special occasion. Nope. I'll wear that $7 beauty just for my sweet, faithful husband. And he appreciates it. Not because he loves me for outer beauty (we have been through far to much for that), but because he recognizes that I cared enough about him to put the effort and time into his opinion of me.

Perhaps in the past I haven't respected his opinion much. Or the world's opinion. Or even God's. Perhaps I was too focused on my own exhaustion, weariness and feelings of anxiety and inferiority, than on serving others. Where is the fun in servanthood after all? Serving God, serving my husband, serving my family. The idea is all well and good, but I was locked in a chains of deceit. Perhaps I would claim serving was my intention, but the reality was I often times based the success on my efforts on what I received in return.

I am aware that many women in the US have the opposite dillema. They care TO MUCH what the world thinks of them. Their social status, the car they drive, how beautiful they look, and who they are able to keep up with in the consumer rat race, but we each have our own battles.

So. This is not a judgement call on how you should dress or what sacrifices God would find pleasing in your life. How could I possibly know what God has asked you to let go of? Fears, shame, anger, bitterness, pearls, clothing, the new cowboy boots you got for Christmas, the infant clothes you've been saving for years, a dream, a desire, a habit. The job that causes you to stumble. The tv show that mixes up your priorities. Now I can handle Keeping Up With The Kardashians, but HGTV sends me into a reno mode with design choices that are only affordable for ACTUAL royalty. So - I'm not saying it's what you watch per se or wear or drive, but what gets your personal flesh raving. Please don't take my Income Property with Scott McGillivray away.

We often associate "blessings" with material objects. At times my facebook timeline are filled with phrases like, "Just got a brand new front load washer/dryer for mother's day! #blessed!!!" (Nothing against front load washer driers! Or even last night after being invited to a Thunder game five rows off the court (not even for the first time), it's tempting for me to tout on the goodness of God! His love endures forever! Look at these awesome NBA seats that would have cost $500 for my friends and I!"

Problem is, I am blessed. I am thankful. God blows my mind every day. He lets me see things through His eyes when I seek His vision. He alone enables me to see the beautiful world He created, even though there are shadows and downright darkness. He alone has taught me that the light is not afraid of the dark. It cannot be squelched by darkness when it is illuminating. It simply causes the darkness to flee.

So. It got me thinking about our many "blessings" (term coined from many a housewife across the MidUSA). Here is a definition (you know how I love definitions) according to Merriam Webster whom I am certain studied it's meaning more than I have had time for (I am, after all, a housewife in the MidUSA). So a definition and of course, a look at the scriptures should settle our minds on what a blessing from God really is.

bless·ed adjective \ˈble-səd\ : having a sacred nature : connected with God : very welcome, pleasant, or appreciated —used to make a statement more forceful Full Definition of BLESSED 1 a : held in reverence : venerated b : honored in worship : hallowed c : beatific 2 : of or enjoying happiness; specifically : enjoying the bliss of heaven —used as a title for a beatified person 3 : bringing pleasure, contentment, or good fortune

So according to this definition, a blessing is something that has a sacred nature or is connected with God. While those basketball tickets are certainly not connected directly with Jesus (although some NBA Thunder fans here in Oklahoma may disagree) the fact that it was a couple from our church who received this as gifts from strangers, and viewed them as a blessing from God, well, we fellowshipped. We thanked Him. We worshipped Him for His goodness! We would have worshipped him anyway, but we His glory was displayed in our humble and gracious hearts.

Matthew 5 Now when Jesus saw the crowds, he went up on a mountainside and sat down. His disciples came to him, 2 and he began to teach them. The Beatitudes He said: 3 ‘Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. 4 Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. 5 Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth. 6 Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled. 7 Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy. 8 Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God. 9 Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God. 10 Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. 11 ‘Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. 12 Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.

Let's be conscious of our many blessings and how we share them with others, that they may edify the Lord and not the object. Let us walk in the discernment as to what constitutes fortitude in His sight. In our hearts, we will know the truth. In His word, we will find it.

Perhaps.

Perhaps I am not the most intellectually superior individual on earth. Perhaps my speech not the most eloquent. My college career was sparse at best. Perhaps my past has blemishes. My present, mistakes. My future, regrets. Perhaps I am of no repute. Or ill repute. Or good repute. Perhaps none of those things matter too much. Perhaps the Lord has given me a heart of gold. Perhaps he has given me enough love to move mountains in His name. Perhaps he has given me the mind to impact this world. Perhaps he has given me the desire. Perhaps I am exactly who He intended me to be at this exact moment. Perhaps His love in my heart is all that I need to do the work, whatever that may be. Perhaps the river of love is immeasurable. Not by length, or depth, or how many people's thirst it quenches or what gulf it eventually pours into. Perhaps the moving and winding and splashing is all that matters. At any pace, to any place, with any creature or thing afloat. Or soaking. Either which way.

Knowing Your Role

I had a conversation not long ago with my older brother regarding our younger sibling, our brother Jacob. Jacob had been having a difficult time finding his place in the world, as we all do at one point or another in our adolescent years, and Joshua, 10 years Jacob's senior was eager to lend a hand in any way that he could.

We had a telephone conversation one afternoon that changed my life. My brothers had run into turmoil and I remember clearly the words spoken that day.

"I just don't get it, Kate! I helped him enroll in school, I've given him a place to sleep, and I even pay for his meals!"

He was trying to understand how things had turned out so wrong, when he was trying to do something so right! Because he loved his brother!

On my end of the line I heard myself saying, "Josh, the best thing that you can do for Jacob is set an example for him. Be the best you that you can be, and do not try to fix his life for him. Set an example of what it looks like to be the best you that you can be."

Or something along those lines... all I know is when I spoke those words, the Lord spoke clearly to me about my own life, revealing the essence of my role as wife and mother, and how to fill it.

It became clear to me that I thought that the people in my life needed me desperately. Now with a newborn baby, there is truth to that.

But this was more than that.

It translated to my husband, my mother, my father, my friends, my brothers, and definitely my children. Unknowingly, I thought that I was their salvation. That there was something I owed each of them in order for them to be fulfilled.

And I felt desperate. Of course I'm not enough to fill all of the physical, emotional, and spiritual needs that I see in my family and friends! Of course I couldn't provide ALL that I wanted to on a physical or spiritual level. And of COURSE, I felt exhausted, frustrated, and inadequate from trying!

And when I spoke those words to my brother, the weight that I had been carrying for years, was suddenly lifted. The Lord spoke to my heart directly, and began a beautiful work in my life based on knowing my role.

I knew at that moment, that what I had been missing in order to make the impact that I desired on my family and friends, a positive impact in their life and not negative!, the work would have to begin in my own heart. The Lord had a lot of work to do and still does, but it is in our weaknesses, that we come to depend on the Lord.

2 Corinthians 12:9

New International Version (NIV)

9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.

I am learning that being a loving, submissive wife that honored and respected my husband is the first part of my role, and takes conscious daily effort. I had to learn to respect his pocket book. Honor his laundry. Honor and respect our home and his family along with mine! I had to learn how to seek God first. How to hold my tongue, control my emotions, and fill up on His love in order to be able to share it.

1 Corinthians 11:3

New International Version (NIV)

3 But I want you to realize that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man,[a] and the head of Christ is God.

As I began to fill up on His word and His goodness and share that with my husband, my husband gained strength, courage, peace, joy and his own desire for more of God's presence in our home.

And as our home changed, so have our children, our friends, and our family. Perhaps in small ways, but I am so thankful for the Spirit of the Lord in our lives.

Give up on fear and replace it with trust.

Give up on shame and accept grace.

Accept imperfections and love despite them.

Give up scrutiny for mercy.

Condemnation for edification.

Death for life.

Looking back over my life, I am able to see God's handiwork. I see His faithfulness and love, and that he wasn't kidding when he said He will never leave us or forsake us. I know that where I have been is not where I am, and that where I am is not where I'm going, but I have the peace of the Lord that He will be with me, wherever that may be. I pray we bring Him glory.

Living Effectively.

Living Effectively.

1ef·fec·tive adjective \i-ˈfek-tiv, e-, ē-, ə-\ : producing a result that is wanted : having an intended effect

Living a life that produces a result that is wanted.

What do you want out of life?

It takes no time at all to begin to look at people and things as a ruler to measure our success. It takes no time at all to look at what you are doing right in life, and what everyone else is doing wrong. No matter how much truth there is or isn't in your conjecture.

It takes no time at all to forget that joy is a choice, and that serving others is a privilege, and not a chore.

It takes no time at all to forget that giving is greater than receiving.

That listening to someone, and giving them your ear, brings far more healing to their soul than showing our own brilliance by identifying the cause and "cure" of their ailments.

It takes no time at all to forget that we are fearfully and wonderfully made and that God the Father will not leave us or forsake us. Even if it feels like everyone, including ourselves, will.

It takes no time at all to forget that the life we want to live contains a lot more laughter than worry, a lot more hugging and dancing and clapping than furrows of the brow or wagging fingers. It takes no time at all to forget that the things we ourselves truly desire are peace, joy, love, grace for others, and grace for ourselves. When we can barely remember that those are the things that we value, it makes it even more difficult to believe that is the innermost desire of others, as well.

But I believe that our actual self and our ideal self are actually one in the same.

The old creation is gone, the new creation has come.

I believe that on a daily basis, our battle is not one against flesh and blood, but of principalities and darkness.

So guard your tongues. Speak life. Speak life. Speak peace. Speak love. Speak forgiveness. For ourselves and for others.

Remember what it is we are living for. Live effectively. Read His Word, and recall all of the beautiful, selfless, compassionate thoughts that you have ever had, and forget the doubt and fear that stole them.

You are not your old self! Live effectively! Guard your tongue, and be aware of each thought that you entertain. Live by His spirit, offering yourself the same grace and room for error that He does. Fight shame, guilt, fear, and doubt with the same fervency you fight injustice. They themselves are an injustice. Identify and admit that The Greatest of These Is Love! As important as accepting yourself as a lover of souls, is accepting others as lovers of souls. Believing in the best of and for one another, is as critical as accepting our own freedom from sin. In order to move the Gospel of peace and love, we must believe that Christ's love lives in the captives, despite their chains, and encourage them to allow His love to shine through, despite the darkness they have come to know and accept. A detailed description of how our love should look:

1 Corinthians 13:4-7 New International Version (NIV) 4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Free Indeed!

"I am told God loves me- and yet the reality of darkness and coldness and emptiness is so great that nothing touches my soul. Before the work started, there was so much union, love, faith, trust, prayer, and sacrifice. Did I make a mistake in surrendering blindly to the Call of the Sacred Heart?" - Mother Theresa

When I read this passage of a personal account written by Mother Theresa, a woman who was undeniably dedicated to Christ's work, I was at once... encouraged. This woman, who, inspired by the love of God, had devoted her own life to servanthood for Christ, and still, emptiness? Darkness? Coldness?

How could someone like Mother Theresa at times feel this way when, clearly, the woman was inspired by the Lord to an exponential degree!?! Because of sin. Sin in the sense of a power that works against us. Sin that Paul speaks of in Romans as a law that continues to work against us, but is not us. Sin, as in a force that crouches in the doorway of our thought lives, our hearts, waiting for it's opportunity to spring into action and convince us that it is us who will never attain righteousness.

But scripture let's us know this is not truth, but a lie.

"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!" 2 Corinthians 5:17

We know that our old self was crucified with [Christ] so that the body ruled by sin might be done away with [made powerless], that we should no longer be slaves to sin - because anyone who has died has been set free from sin. Romans 6:6-7

Slaves to sin. You see. We were not once just sinners, engulfed in lust, greed, pride, envy, drunkedness, and debauchery, but we were slaves to sin.

slave - slāv/ - noun 1.a person who is the legal property of another and is forced to obey them.

Christ came to set us free from slavery to sin, that we might accept ourselves as loving, peaceful, joyful, beings like our Father. Not only to change our lives, but to share with our children, spouses, brothers, sisters, and even strangers... As followers of Christ, we are sometimes all to eager to accept our sins as who we are, condemning ourselves (we really don't need help from anyone else in this area!) and we forget that we are truly a new creation. Our old selves no longer exist

And while a battle is constantly at war between sin and our flesh, we thank God for his Word that brings us truth and renews our minds to know God's good and perfect will.

John 8:36 (NIV) 36 So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.

The difference between the lost and those who know Christ, is that we are no longer forced to obey sin, whose wage is death. Thank you Lord for using me to help set free the captives.

Book Rave! "The Naked Gospel"

The Naked Gospel is one that may challenge your belief system, in a much needed way! It brings FREEDOM!!! It brings truth. And it inspires. I am only halfway through the book and had to stop to tell you about it!